219. Alayna's Homecoming

Family all around the house

One two three four five six twelve

All the grandkids, uncles, aunts

Noise and thunder rumble loud

Run run run their feet explode

So excited. Alayna's home.

218. Naptime

Naptime is essential

To all who are involved.

There's none more influential

For a problem to be solved.

Cause of you don't have naptime

You all may just go wild.

You may not feel you're apt. I'm

Sorry you're not mild.

So take a nap for mother,

Before you drive her crazy,

And take with you your brother,

For he is just that lazy.

217. Oblivion Smiles

Sometimes there are no thoughts.

Sometimes there are no words.

You are greeted simply with a blank space.

An empty sheet.

A void.

Some people call it writer's block.

Some call it stress.

Some call it laziness.

To me it is oblivion.

Oblivion is safety.

Oblivion is chaos.

It is everything I reach for

And hope for.

It is the unformed matter of my imagination.

It is massive and unreachable

And yet it is minute and microscopic.

But it holds all hope.

It is oblivion.

And it smiles.

216. On the Path

Nothing can stop me

I'm on my way

Nothing can hurt me

I'm doing okay

I'm on the road

To another place

I'm on the road

And it's not a race

Power and strength 

Are my final goal

Power and strength 

are in my soul

215. To Sew

Up down up down up down up

Sew it. Stitch it. Close it up.

Down up down up down up down

Back and forth and all around.

Up down up down up down up

Bend it. Twist it. Fold it up.

Down up down up down up down

Seeing does not make me frown.

214. Adam Fell That Men Might Be

A few days ago I was reading my scriptures and came across a verse I have heard hundred times. "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy" (2 Ne 2:25).

Really, hundreds of times. It's one of the few scriptures I can quote verbatim. But I guess I never really really looked at it. I always just read it and moved on. I know Adam fell for men. I know men are supposed to be happy. Okay, cool. 

But this time I saw it differently. I suppose it has to do something with the Mary and Eve picture I wrote about last week. Or maybe I just read it at the right moment. Or maybe I just really needed to see it differently. I don't know. But this time I was caught by the comma. 

Yes, a comma. "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy." I had always assumed this was just fancy biblical language that tranated roughly to "Adam fell so men could live and men should be happy." But it's not. And men are. That's the main phrase. Men are. Adam (and, in my Eve/Mary mindframe, Eve) fell so that man could come to earth. And men are, men exists on earth so that they might have joy. 

This shed a whole new light for me. I know we came to earth to receive our physical bodies. I know we came to earth so that we can become like God. I know that we came to earth to prove ourselves and choose the right path. But all of this is for us. "Men are, that they might have joy." 

Adam and Eve didn't accidentally eat the apple. It wasn't Satan ruining God's plan. Eve knew that she would never know joy in the Garden of Eden, for without sin there can be no redemption. Without pain there can be no pleasure. She could not bring man into the world without the fall. The Fall was an intricate and essential part of the plan of salvation. She chose to eat the fruit of the knowledge of good and evil. She chose to be the mother of all the earth. She chose to give life to men. And she couldn't have done it without Adam. Adam and Eve fell so that men might live on earth; and men live on earth, so that they might find joy in eternal life.

Glory, Hallelujah!

213. Sean the Salesman

So this guy knocked on the door at five o'clock sharp the other day. First off, who's actually home from work at five on the dot? Not my husband, usually. School teachers, yes, but not someone who works 8-5 unless they have a two second commute time. Anyway, back to Sean the Salesman. 

So I open the door and there's this nice-looking young man selling lawn-watering systems. I'm sure you've seen them around. They're a dime a dozen. Now, normally when these salespeople come by I listen for three seconds and say I'm not interested and that's that. But for whatever reason I thought "you know, I actually think I do want what this guy is selling." But as I said, my husband isn't home at five sharp and a high class lawn-watering system is probably something we ought to discuss before purchasing. 

So I told Sean the Salesman, to come back in about an hour when my husband will be home. The hour came and went and he didn't come back, but that turned out alright because my husband didn't either. By seven thirty he was home and I'd complete forgotten about Sean the salesman. 

Half an hour later I was putting the kids down when the doorbell rang. Up to my elbows in baby poop, I didn't think it would be very appropriate for me to run downstairs and quickly explain to Jake my mistake. I heard the door open, heard the usual "sorry, we're not interested," the unusual murmured exchange, and then the door shut.

 Having finished with my cleanup, I headed down the stairs as Jake was headed up. "Did "so-and-so" company stop by today?" He asked.

Oops. Cough. "Uh, yeah," I say back. "I told him to come back when you were home."

"Oh. I told him we weren't interested. Are we?"

"I actually am a bit."

"Oh. You didn't tell me about it."

"Yeah. I forgot. Oh well."

And I figured that was that. I went downstairs to turn on a show to rest a bit before cleaning. Feeling sick is an exhausting business. Jake went upstairs to change into his workout clothes and hit the gym. 

He came back down, kissed me goodbye, and headed out to the car. Now, our couch sits against the wall of the garage. It's the only logical place for it. So it's no miracle that I could hear Jake talking to someone outside. At first I figured it was our neighbor and I kept scrolling through Netflix trying to find a show. But they kept talking and talking and talking. And then I realized the voice talking back (it got closer and thus louder) was a man. Turns out Jake had seen Sean the Salesman in the street, and rather than ignore him and let me feel the consequences of my forgetfulness, he flagged Sean the Salesman down, admitted we had had a miscommunication and asked about his system. And then he spent the next twenty minutes discussing options and pricing and what-not with a salesman he had dismissed, because I was interested, even though he wasn't at all. Now that's true love: giving up your limited man-time to do something for your wife. He's awesome. 

But poor Sean the salesman. We got his hopes up. Smashed them. Got them up again. Smashed them. Turns out a lawn-watering system is a bit more expensive than we're willing to pay just yet. But I guess that's what you sign up for when you move from Utah to Texas to become a salesman.